i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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