It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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