hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
