that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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