my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
You ate ashes out of my bong
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
