I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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