I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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