So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Why is there bacon in the couch?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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