Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
