Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
