these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize