brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
