Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
