Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
