Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
