i need an iv and a liver transplant
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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