We named our party play list daddy issues
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
