dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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