i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Randomize