Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
