he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
