it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
