actually, I'm a sock model
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Slut skills are useful in every country.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I am available for nakedness
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
