but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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