If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
