they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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