Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
