rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
