I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
