Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Randomize
