A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
