There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
