What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize