normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
