I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
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