dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
