I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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