Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Don't EVER smell your tampon
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Randomize
