Can Purell be used as lube?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
