is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
