just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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