i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize