between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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