Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
