I think I just saw someone hide a body.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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