I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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