She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
