just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize