Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize