Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
two words...techno handjob
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I think a kid would responsible me up
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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