im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize